User talk:TheElderOnes
From Create Your Own Story
Please make sure you include the category and status bar on the pages you post. --Platypus 21:29, 25 February 2010 (UTC)
Oops, yeah. Sorry, forgot that. Knew something was wrong. --TheElderOnes 06:45, 27 February 2010 (UTC)
Please don't make me keep reminding you about the category. --Platypus 20:47, 27 February 2010 (UTC)
Damnit! Sorry, still getting a hang of this wiki, keep forgetting that part. Are you the only mod? Cause I haven't seen any other ones, and if you have to do all of this on your own, then I'll definitely keep a better eye out. --TheElderOnes 02:20, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
I'm the only syop here on a regular basis. RobKohr is the admin, but he only pops in now and then.
As for adding a link to a pic, I'm not entirely sure how to do that. Given time, I'll see if I can research an answer. --Platypus 22:44, 1 March 2010 (UTC)
Sounds good to me, man. --TheElderOnes 02:20, 2 March 2010 (UTC)
Thanks for the warning. You can't always tell a person's age by the maturity of their writing, though. Besides, it doesn't look like he's coming back to write more. --Platypus 12:59, 7 May 2010 (UTC)
I would just like to congratulate you on finishing your story. This makes you a member of a very, VERY small and privileged club! i enjoyed reading it so good luck with the next one! --Fletcher Peninsula
I definitely agree with you about the tags. If I can find a way to remove them, a lot of tags are going away! --Platypus 11:23, 6 April 2011 (UTC)
I know you've been working on the story "Megan", and it's your story [and very good, if depressing], but I hope you don't mind that I added one page to it. I tried to keep to the spirit of the story. Your work is excellent. --Teejay
Since you asked, I do like the story "Megan". The theme is incredibly depressing, so it reminds me of my poetry. So far, my favorite kill is the quick one in the kitchen, where Megan snaps Vanessa's neck. I look forward to the rest of the story. --Teejay
Hey thanks. Do you recognize the faces I used for the status bars? --AgentVincent 04:15, 29 July 2011 (UTC)
Congrats on finishing "Megan". Great story! --Teejay
No problem go right ahead and use it. It's not copywritten and it does have a nice ring to it. --The Hand
Thank You!! I haven't technically 'finished' it yet (kind of not read through and checked for grammar errors yet), but thank you so much for reading through it. Oh and i've read through "Megan". My god, that story is simply put, magnificent. Especially the first time I read through it, yes I did read it through more than once. I hope that you continue making stories. Hey, maybe you can do a 'what if?' edition to this story. I'd like to see what would have happened if she didn't go through with, you know. --Heyoeveryone 17 September 2011
Yeah, the 'What If?' idea was for if Megan didn't do the kill, and there is a page where Vanessa kills Megan! The gun and power-tool kills? That sounds nasty, but, my violent side (which is very limited) still wants to read them.
And i've played through a bit of War Pigs, that is a pretty tough one to beat. Though, i'm sure you will.
Oh and one last question. I need you give your thoughts on these three ideas, as it will come into consideration of what I will do next. Should I?:
- Story about a man who has lost his memory, locked in a room with no walls, only item he has is a walkie talkie, where the kidnapper says he can leave, or he can save another person.
- High School Story. Didn't really have a good idea on this, it's either going to be about a war that starts happening around them, or they have a huch paintball match for a prize.
- Story Reviews. Going to look at three different sections, Grammar, Story, Ending/Completion.
--Heyoeveryone September 18 2011
Reviewed!
Hey! I just finished typing up my review for your story, Megan. I know it's not finished and such, but i'm right now reviewing all the stories that have been nominated for becoming featured, and your one was on the top of the list. So here's the review, and enjoy! --Heyoeveryone 4 October 2011
If you really want to know, it was the first one with the plastic bag. Oh my god that was brutal. That page was really well done, and I can still imagine it in my head. Ow... Anyways thanks in advance if you do write a review. I hope that more people get into the reviewing so it feels less empty. --Heyoeveryone 8 October 2011
Hey! Recently, I've been working on this new story called Remember, and I was wondering, if you aren't to busy, maybe perhaps to read through it? If you would like a little premise, you find yourself locked inside a room with no windows, one door, and a walkie talkie, you also have forgotten who you are. The whole point is to escape the room and find out who you actually are. I'd just want to have an honest opinion about the story. --Heyoeveryone 17 October 2011
I recently read your review that you posted up today. What a way to start off, Inyasha's Fantasy Land. XD. To be honest, I haven't had a chance to actually take a read through this story, but with all this 'hype' about it being extremely bad, I was wondering if it was really that bad. Guess it turns out with your review it is! Great review I must say. You going to do more? --Heyoeveryone 10:08, 12 November 2011 (UTC)
e-cig spammers
Thanks for the heads-up. I'd noticed the e-cig spammers, but I figure that as long as they confine their spam to talk pages, there's no need to delete them. If they spread their spam to regular pages or post on anyone else's talk pages, then they'll be banned and their postings removed. --Platypus 14:05, 17 August 2011 (UTC)
Question on something that could be considered a "nonstory"
It seems to me that marking story supplement material as part of the Elderpedia would be the best way to go. --Platypus 12:17, 15 September 2011 (UTC)
Having an IRC chat is an interesting idea. It's something that should probably be run past RobKohr using the 'Request a Feature' link. --Platypus 15:37, 17 September 2011 (UTC)
Time Stopper proposal reply
Hey TheElderOnes, Thanks for your praise on my new story I am glad you've enjoyed it so far.
As for the proposal of letting you write a few pages I will accept with a few conditions and details of the characters
Firstly I would like you to only do the city visit where the protaginist will cause trouble as I have everything of the highschool visit planned already.
Secondly I would like you to keep with my linking method which is [Time Stopper/Action|AddedText] or [TimeStopper/PersonAction|AddedText]
And now to the character(s).
The protagonist is very intellectual being able to deduce a situation very quickly
before gaining powers he grew to hate the world that hated him but upon getting his powers he has grown to be a bit sadistic and full of hatred.
also I plan to make a rival in the story with a different 'God-given' power... but I plan on introducing said character after the city arc has ended.
which brings me to a big point... try to keep the protagonist a little diguised so he doesn't just get caught so that he can still go to bed at the end of the day without having SWAT teams bursting through his window lol.
also try to reference previous dialogue/actions it brings more emotion to it I reckon.
I'll note before finishing that the School arc is a dead end or just a fanservice arc whilst City leads into the next part of the story I have planned (Which again will split into 2 paths if you wish to continue writing after the city arc.)
as a closing statement be sure to add a few spots where the reader can get a sex scene as the story is an 18+ adult story after all...
well anyway I made a big wall of text on your page sorry bout' that ha ha... anyways glad to have you aboard. --Mezzo 14:29, 10 October 2011 (UTC)
-
Firstly good that you understand the protgonist, so yes cleverly orchestrated incidents that could perhaps cause massive whirlwinds of chaos while the protagonist sits and watchs it unfold
as for specfic events in the city I would like only 2 things the introduction of Merissa Silvers, a childhood friend of the protagonist who he hasn't seen since he way 10, her personality is outwardly happy but she hides a few secrets behind her smiles, I would like her only covered quickly though since I want the readers to feel the mystery of the character as she WILL be important later in the story.
the other things I want covered is a visit to 'Green Horn Bar' the bar that the protagonists mom gets drunk at. I would like the protagonist to help an innocent chick that is being taken advantage of by the patrons of the bar this could be a good spot also to introduce Merissa I guess. the green horn bar reeks of alcohol and is usually full of shady people.
anything else is left to your imagination, be as gory in description as you wish go nuts :P --Mezzo 15:16, 10 October 2011 (UTC)
answer
Actually, every time I issue a warning about the category, I think about just creating a template instead of re-typing it. Maybe next time I'll do that. Next time is likely to be soon. --Platypus 11:39, 1 November 2011 (UTC)
Hey, uhh
Are you like a moderator of some sorts now? I've noticed you having a higher amount of activity than most other users, with many of your recent changes just categorizing page after page. Whether you are or not, I'd like to say good job! Someone needed to help Platypus with all the maintenance of the site. Heyoeveryone 07:24, 8 November 2011 (UTC)
Now I've been thinking, would it be a good idea if make this page and the pages after it into a new story (I'd call it a new Chapter). I'm thinking of naming this 'Chapter 2' or 'Remember: Escape'. I am doing this because I was originally going to make it three parts, 'Remember' , 'Remember: The Waiting', then 'Remember: Escape'. If the story was popular, I would do a 'Remember: Epilogue' section as well. Why am I telling you this? Well, I need another persons opinion on it, and with the amount of stories that you've read, your opinion is more influential than others. --Heyoeveryone 04:59, 16 November 2011 (UTC)
I asked you because you were one of the only two people who would reply to my question in less than 24hrs (the other being Platypus). Anyway, thanks for your reply. Have fun doing what ever you do! --Heyoeveryone 06:14, 17 November 2011 (UTC)
Hi. Thanks for fixing up my spelling/grammar there and (I'm guessing) reading. :) I am not sure how I totally missed that error. -- Cpt Devonin
Found it! I'm pretty sure.
Well, I think I found your upcoming project. Noonegetstoseewhat'sherebecauseit'satitleandntoinmyplacetorevealthetitlebutdon'tclickoonitanyway.. It's not shitty at all, by the way. Great introduction. Myself, I prefer to just throw someone into the fray with only a description of who they are. Reckon I should change that. Good job on finishing everything though. Just make another page so no one can seee it through the special pages.
Well, great job, hope you can finish it so... wait, I think putting the link over there kinda takes it out of the orphaned bit. Well, I'll go search for the other part then. Figure it should be the Elderpedia. Hmmm...
--Snowball- The Anti-Adult-Content Resistance Leader 04:01, 21 December 2011 (UTC)
I think I found the other bit then.
Thisisevenmorerevealingsonooneelsegetstotouchthis.
The page has only been acessed 5 times and several are probably you typing more, so, 1 other person?--Snowball- The Anti-Adult-Content Resistance Leader 04:06, 21 December 2011 (UTC)
Entry One - April 26th, 2011 I noticed that it says "It scared me at first, but it went away after I took a shower." What went away? The feeling of fear? The dream? Don't think it's the latter, since that would require sleep-showering. So, umm... Clarify. See ya. --Snowball- The Anti-Adult-Content Resistance Leader 11:19, 18 June 2012 (UTC)
I'd also like to say that you seem to have your own little universe of interwoven stories. I see what you did with the diary and Megan. Sorry about the many posts, my mind is volatile.--Snowball- The Anti-Adult-Content Resistance Leader 12:34, 18 June 2012 (UTC)
Small Request...
Hi TheElderOnes,
I'd like to make a teensy request that you refrain from editing my half-written pages (even to add the category) for at least an hour or two to give me time to finish it and add it myself. (If I haven't done it after an hour or two, something must have come up to pull me AFK).
I mainly ask because you just edited a page I was writing and since I couldn't copy/paste to merge the two (or find any other way to merge them aside from rewriting or c/p) I ended up having to rewrite the whole thing, very slowly, even though after I'd have saved it, it would have had the category added... ^^"
I have to occasionally save pages early/before finishing cause I either forget something I need on the previous page, or, do it just in case my phone crashes (which it likes to do from time to time) so I don't lose everything. Especially on longer pages. And by doing it on my phone it takes me a bit longer to type pages than it would if I had a keyboard.
I'm not bothered or anything, I've lost whole pages before due to my phone crashing so the fact that I could save this one after I wrote it a way I was sorta happy with was good. I just thought I'd toss the request out there to save me having to do this too often... ^^"
Thank you, -- Cpt. Devonin )-( 07:36, 26 December 2011 (UTC)
The life of a medieval princess
Started writing again after a bit of a break, too busy with work ^^
btw, I think I noticed a major error in my spelling/grammatica
I always use 's and recently heard sometimes it's supposed to be s'
like :
the boy's car / the boys' car
I don't really know when exactly to use s' tho. Best guess so far : after names and plurals.
Dunno if its really something important either so I figured I'd ask.
P.S.: I read bloodsport, its still only a beginning, but it didn't sound half bad. I think it might be an interesting read once its finished.
deleteme
I understand what you're trying to do by tagging pages with the deleteme category, but categorizing those pages actually makes them stand out less for me. They're much easier to spot when they're uncategorized. --Platypus 11:42, 27 March 2012 (UTC)
Bloodsport.
Hey, I'm glad to hear you like Naomi and Jack so far. Any feedback on Jack specifically would be helpful, since I'm not used to writing teenage males. By the way, if you see any typos/grammar errors in any of my pages, feel free to correct them. I write on my phone and it's sometimes impossible to scroll through an input box.
I'd really like to see you continue Marissa and Bloodsport. Her story stopped before any blood was spilled.
-Sennen 14:14, 31 May 2012 (UTC)
You're free to use Erin if you'd like. I'll go ahead and fill in her description and a couple others. I'm pretty comfortable with most of my named characters being borrowed, actually. The only one I consider off limits is Monique, and that's only because I haven't shown her personality yet-after a few pages, she's free as well.
Tribal warfare sounds fantastic, like the kind of thing the Królowa Krwis would have done in the past. Plus, given some of the unusual practices that obscure tribes sometimes have, it has a gold mine of potential inspiration.
-Sennen 01:13, 2 June 2012 (UTC)
Hey! I have a question. Why did you chose to write things in Polish? Are you Polish? --Lovetoread 00:13, 24 September 2012 (UTC) Ok, cool! --Lovetoread
Please help!
A bunch of people are vandalizing Platypus's page, I did that once on my old account GreatGrapes once, but someone (I think) mocked my vandalism because I saw that someone mocked me by trying to undo the page and I think hacked my old account, tell him that I was hacked and I gone on Google Chrome to see if I could be able to make an account again, and I did and I chose my Wikimedia username "Newman2" that I first used on Wikispecies. I had to make a new account because someone changed my old account's password, and the IP changed. --Newman2 22:31, 31 July 2012 (UTC)
Rescue
I didn't think it was nearly as bad as you described it. I actually liked it. Sure as hell beats having to read even one line of Twilight. -- Teejay
Megan
Nice to see you add a new weapon. That story is depressing but very well written.
By the way, will there be an ending where Megan bypasses all the weapons, fights off the horrible inner voice and survives the day [maybe moving in with Vanessa], or is it merely going to be all killing? [Not that it really matters, but I'm just curious. and a sucker for happy endings.] -- Teejay
Storyboard
I am trying to create some sort of table that shows the story flow, so you can see the paths, but it is a rather long list, with some options repeating multiple times in the opening. You can see what I am trying at Dirty Me/Storyboard. I saw someone else do one, and it looked like a nice way to see how it flows, better than the categories since you do not know what leads to what. However, since it is so long, I would like to be able to let people hide and show. So, for example, you start with the opening of the story hidden (All I have added so far) hidden, then can unhide, see what happens first, follow the links to where you want to go, and click on the exact area you want to go, unhiding choice by choice. However, when I tried the Wikipedia template, it seems to not work, and I am not good enough to know what I did wrong. Or maybe there is a better way to do it? --Dirty Me 10:16, 7 March 2014 (UTC)
Yes, my private website I use javascript to enable a collapsible table. So, I have the needed java script, but I don't know how to enable that on a wiki. --Dirty Me 11:43, 8 March 2014 (UTC)
Similar websites?
I played through your story "Rescue" and enjoyed it, it's much better work from beginning to end than most online interactive stories I've read, and it has the added bonus of actually being readable... Awful grammar = argh. I had to edit this post because I spelled grammar wrong, ha.
I just started a story of my own, the link to which you'll see on my user page, but it's a little discouraging to see just how inactive this community seems to be. I've thought about migrating my story to CHYOA.com and continuing it there, ever tried to write something on that site? Not quite sure how it compares.
Wannabe rockstar 15:18, 21 December 2015 (UTC)
- No worries, I've been really busy lately so I only just logged in to read your comments. Yeah, to be honest, that's a drawback of the site for me too. Even though I'm writing an adult story, I can't really write porn. I envision the Laura storyline of Darklands having some erotic comedy at the most, and the Brenna storyline is going to be pretty serious (the other characters have yet to be thought out). I figure that since it's a public story, if people are interested they can create branches of the story where pornier things happen, if they're so inclined. Since my story is also about adventuring and killing things and being killed, it'll probably also stray over the bounds of "light violence" and the horror is probably going to be more than mild. :/ Anyway, I'd definitely be interested in reading anything new you have in the works, let me know if you get back in the writing groove!
Wannabe rockstar 22:10, 22 January 2016 (UTC)
